Alaska Bound!

Well it is official... we found out today that we will be moving to Kodiak, Alaska! For the next two years of my life this is what my backyard will look like!


I think I am still in shock with the belief that we are seriously going to be moving to Alaska, but at the same time I am excited beyond belief. It is going to be a HUGE change, but I have had to teach myself that with Kevin being in the Coast Guard, we have to embrace change, and look at it as an adventure (which this move will definitely be!). As you can imagine I have been googling Kodiak a lot lately, and here are a few of my favorite pictures and some of the things I am most excited to see!

This is all so new to us that we don't have much information on the move yet, but I will make sure to keep you posted. As a Parks, Recreation, and Tourism major this move is like a dream come true! The wildlife that we will be able to experience in its natural habitat will be unbelievable. Looks like it is time to bite the bullet and invest in a high quality camera! :)

"Just for One"

(Warning...today's post is pretty pathetic, and also a little more personal than some might wish to know)

Today has been one of those days that I just dread to even think about. I thought I did a very good job of keeping myself together yesterday when I dropped Kevin off at the airport and came home to realize that I would be back on my twin bed all alone. I woke up this morning in good spirits, did my Biggest Loser game on the Wii (which kicked my butt!), got my grocery list together, took down Christmas, and was off to the grocery store. My thought process has always been that the more busy I stay, the less time I will have to "think". It wasn't until I was standing in line at the grocery store and looked over at the steamable broccoli and cheese I was about to purchase that I noticed the side of the box said "Just for One". It was in that moment that I realized that that is exactly what I am (I know its not forever, but for the next 9 weeks I am, and I'm allowed to feel sorry for myself every now and then!) Now, I know there are thousands of women out there with husbands in the military, and I know that I really don't have it that bad since Kevin doesn't have to leave for years at a time, but considering our past and what we went through roughly 3 months ago, it still hits hard. I never knew that my miscarriage would still affect me the way that it does. Not only am I "one" because Kevin is in California, but I am "one" because I no longer have a baby growing inside of me.

(Warning...this is where it gets a little TOO personal)
With the anticipation of Kevin coming home for the holidays, we immediately began discussing the possibility of trying for a baby again. We hadn't been able to (obviously) for the past 9 weeks, and we were very optimistic. Due to my previous period cycles it appeared that I would be ovulating while Kevin was here, increasing our chances (and hopes) of getting pregnant again. One of the reasons why I took a pregnancy test (when I received a positive reading) was because I had extreme soreness in my boobs. Not like I'm about to start my period, but to the point where I thought I could possibly have breast cancer. The Monday after Christmas I began to realize that there was no sort of pain similar to this, and I began to prepare myself for the thought of not getting pregnant this time around. On Tuesday I began cramping really bad, and Wednesday I started my period. Not only does this mean my period is extremely out of whack since I got it a week early, it was the proof I had been dreading that would show me that I am once again not pregnant. Getting my period is hard enough, its like a slap to the face, a constant reminder that there is not longer a baby in there, but this time it was proof that our attempts were a failure. I know that I have to stay positive, and to keep reminding myself that God does have a plan for us, but that is really much easier said than done. I know that things will get easier, and when it is the perfect time for Kevin and I we will have the wonderful experience of pregnancy and parenthood. I just have days where I feel like it is all crumbling down on me, and on those days my blog becomes my venting tool! So to all of you who sucked it up and continued to read, I apologize and thank you for putting up with my pathetic days!

BIG NEWS!

How could I have forgotten!! The big news we had been waiting for were Kevin's picks on where we would possibly be moving. We received these the Friday before Kevin flew in, and lets just say that we will not be anywhere near Texas. The way the whole thing is set up is kind of screwy and is on a ranking system. There are 18 people in Kevin's class, 6 of which are girls. There are 12 land bases, and 6 cutters (the big boats that are out of 3-6 months at a time). The 6 girls are guaranteed land bases, so Kevin basically has a 50/50 chance of either a land base or a cutter. We are really pushing for a land base since it would be a dream come true to have my husband come home to me every night, and not gone for months at a time. Kevin doesn't know where he stands as far as the ranking system, but has an idea that he is about number 7 or 8. This puts 6-7 guys in front of him and 1 girl. Since there are only 6 land bases, it could come down the point where he has no option, but a cutter. Due to this, we have a "strategy" we are basically going to pick the land station that we are about 99% positive no one wants to go to, and put that as our first pick! Now I know you are probably thinking, "just tell me what the damn picks are already!" so here goes...

Land Bases (the ones that I can at least remember):
Maine
Lake Michigan
Massachusetts
2 in Virginia
Jacksonville, Florida (Kevin says there is no chance at getting that one)
San Fransisco, California
Long Island, New York
Buffalo, New York
Kodiak, Alaska

Cutters:
3 in Hawaii
2 in Alaska
1 in San Diego, CA (Kevin says there is no chance at getting that one either)

So what could be the worst possible land base? I'm sure you have guessed it... Kodiak, Alaska! That is what will be out number one choice as to where we will be moving in March. At first I thought we must be out of our minds, but as it has begun to sink in, I am really pretty excited. We still don't know if that will be where we are going for sure, but our hope is that a few people that are in front of Kevin in the ranks will chose to go to Hawaii (I mean what single guy wouldn't want to) and that will almost guarantee us Kodiak, which guarantees me my husband at home every night.

Kevin will put in our list on Monday, and keep your fingers crossed that we will know for certain where we are moving by Friday! Who knows if that will happen with how slow things seem to move around there, but a girl can hope!

wow... it's already 2010!

So I promise I did not fall off the face of the Earth this past month! When I logged onto my blog today I was shocked to see that my last post was done on December 1st! So to all of my dear friends who keep a close eye on my personal life through blog (possibly in addition to facebook) I apologize for the delay. Its tough to even think about what all has happened in the past month, but I can tell you one thing for sure... time seems to fly by WAY to fast!

A brief recap of the MAJOR events that happened in December:
1.) Kelli Nesbitt graduated from Sam Houston on Friday, December 18
2.) My mom (Rhonda Curry) graduated from Sam Houston on Saturday, December 19
3.)Kevin flew into Texas on Saturday, December 19th
4.) My mom had her graduation party on Saturday, December 19th
5.) Kellis had her graduation party on Saturday, December 19th

(If you can't tell that Saturday was a BUSY day!!)

Now for a breakdown of the holidays:

After that extremely hectic weekend, Kevin and I made our way down to the valley to spend roughly 4 days with his family. Wednesday night was the O'Connor/Garcia Family Christmas party where we had amazing food, a white elephant gift exchange, and watched a slide show of old Christmas pictures. It was the first time in a very long time that Kevin's entire family (for the most part) was all together under one roof. The following night was Christmas Eve, and we drove to Harlingen to spend that evening with the Curry side of the family. It was a much smaller group this year, but was still worth every minute. We had a white elephant gift exchange there as well, and my poor Nana had every gift she picked stolen from her! It breaks my heart that I don't see her more often, and as we got ready to leave she began to tear up and told me that the best gift she received was having us there. We drove back Kevin's parents that night, with Lauren in tow, and we sat around and played skip-bo until about 1 in the morning! We got up bright and early, loaded the car, and headed to Austin to have Christmas Day with my mom and her family. This was also a big ordeal because it was the first time in almost 3 years that all of my mom's family was together for the holidays. We came back to Huntsville Saturday afternoon and spent the rest of the time that Kevin was here visiting friends and just trying to spend as much time as possible with each other. We stayed in Huntsville for New Years Eve at the Holiday Inn Express and watched movies and had champagne in our pajamas with just the two of us. It was a very low key New Years Eve, but I had everything I wanted right there with me.

Today was a tough day. I think the anticipation leading up to it really made it much harder, but taking Kevin to the airport today and knowing that I wont see him for another 9 weeks makes my heart hurt. It was the best feeling having him here with me, and just as things started to slow down and we had a little time to rest and just enjoy each other, it was time for him to leave. I am still trying to get my mini-vacation, so hopefully the first weekend in February I will be able to go visit (since I didn't get to go after Thanksgiving).

So that was my month of December in a nut shell... The best part of my Christmas was getting to see all my family and have my husband home with me. It is crazy to think how much can change in a year...last year the only family we saw for Christmas was my mom and sister who flew to Baltimore to see us, and this year we got to see almost every family member we have!

DECEMBER!

December= 18 days until I get to FINALLY see Kevin and 25 days until CHRISTMAS!!

Random fact #1 about Lindsey- I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!! Not in a "oh those lights look pretty" type of way, but I love every aspect of the holiday and the entire month leading up to it. We usually put our Christmas tree up the weekend after Thanksgiving, but this year we put it up on Thanksgiving! And you better believe the Christmas music has been playing since then.

I think my favorite part of Christmas is the tradition we have always been a part of on the Curry side of the family, my favorite being Christmas Eve. It is always at my Aunt Jill's house, where more than likely we will have tamales, queso, and lots of booze! We also always do a white elephant, one for the women and one for the men. The women's always gets very intense (usually everyone is fighting over what my Aunt Candy brings)! My Uncle Steve dresses up as Santa and brings all the little kids a gift, and then we all get to take pictures with him. Overall it is just a great night that we all get to spend together and have lots of laughs. I usually only get to see the whole family together once or twice a year, so it's great getting to catch up with everyone, which there are TONS! My dad is one of seven (and five of the seven are grandparents), so you can only imagine how big our holidays get!

But this year I think I have so much more to be excited and thankful about. First of all, I will finally get to be with my sweet hubby after 9 weeks of not seeing him!!! This will be our second Christmas as a married couple, but our first in Texas with our families. Last year we decided we would stay in Baltimore, and my mom and sister flew up to visit for a few days, and then Kevin's mom and younger brother Liam flew up right after them. It was great having a Christmas in our home. This year will be a lot of traveling, but I CAN NOT wait to finally get to see everyone after such a long time. Our plan is that December 20th we will drive to the valley and stay with Kevin's parents. We still haven't decided when exactly all of his relatives will be coming over to celebrate Christmas, but we will be attending the Curry Christmas Eve for sure. Then we will be waking up early Christmas Morning and driving back to Huntsville to have Christmas Day with my mom and sister, and the day after that we will be going to Austin to see my grandparents on my mom's side. So overall, it could be almost an entire week of Christmas festivities and I am so excited!!

Hope everyone is staying safe and warm on this cold and rainy first of December!! And you better believe my TV will be thoroughly enjoying abc family's 25 days of Christmas!

Weird...

Let me begin by saying that I can not wait for Monday to get here! Although this week has gone by at a pretty steady speed, I am beginning to get extremely anxious. I know a while back I said I was torn about wanting to stay in Texas, but as the holiday season approaches, I realize how nice it would be to stay here in Texas and be able to enjoy the holidays with our families. That being said... this Thanksgiving was a weird one for me. Don't get me wrong, it was good and I was so thankful to be with my mom and sister, but it was just a little "off" for me.

This time last year, Kevin had just graduated from boot camp and we had moved to Baltimore. Our first full day in Baltimore was Thanksgiving Day, and it was so memorable! It was our first holiday together as a married couple, and it was such a disaster with the move that we had to hunt for our pots and pans, silverware, and plates...but that was what made it so great. It was just the two of us, in our pajamas, in the freezing cold, eating around boxes. Being together was what made it perfect. This year on the other hand, was the complete opposite. We were separated by 1700 miles and the trip I thought I was going to be able to take the day after had to be postponed, so it wont be another 3 weeks before I get to see him.

Besides missing my husband terribly. I feel like my immediate family is just in a very "weird" place. Lauren, my younger sister has started dating her ex boyfriend Austin again. He left this past August to attend Texas State in San Marcos. He doesn't come home to visit often, but obviously he was home for Thanksgiving. This week started off great. Lauren and I would go and run every morning and she would go to work with me in the afternoon. It was the first time in a long time that we had spent some really quality time together in a long time! Austin came into town Wednesday and everything changed. She has begged, pouted, and been depressed every minute she has been home with us until she gets her way and is able to go hang out with Austin. I understand that she wants that "family" atmosphere, but at the same time she needs to realize that me and my mom are her family! This is what she has to work with for the rest of her life. I guess more than anything my feelings were really hurt... I got ditched for a boy (who has treated her like crap in the past).

Then on the other hand you have my mom. First of all, when Lauren gets upset about seeing Austin my mom loses it, and then eventually gives in. But then Lauren gets to leave, and I am the one here that gets to listen to my mom repeat 15 times that she is just so pissed. But her moods quickly shifts once her cell phone rings. You see... Kelli and I sort of set my mom up! Well...its more like Mr. Vallejo (Kelli's mom's new husband) set them up, but we can take the credit for it. It has gotten to where they talk on the phone for hours every night! And although all I want is for my mom to be happy...it is just WEIRD! I mean she is either on the phone with him, or talking to me about him, or making us clean the house because he is coming to pick her up for a date tomorrow! Like I said, I am so thankful she is happy and enjoys talking to him and I truly do hope that things work out between them, but it gets overwhelming.

I have come to realize that I am a person who does not like change very much. I mean moving and rearranging furniture type of change is fun and exciting, but my day to day life needs to stay consistant, and at this point it is not. I feel so out of place... all I want at this point is to move out. Not that I am miserable and hate it here, but because I feel like I'm left in everyone else's dust. As my Lauren and my mom's lives are moving and pushing forward, and I stuck here in my "dungeon" (that's what I've decided to call my "room", which is really the office with a twin bed shoved in a corner). So sorry my Thanksgiving Day post wasn't upbeat and very thankful, I think I have just been consumed by the weirdness of what I am going through at this point in my life!

Well, for those of you who use my blog as the main source of information from me you will be disappointed to find out that I did not find out our picks yesterday. :( There had been some miscommunication with Kevin's class and the instructors, so we will not be finding out our picks (or better phrased, options) until NEXT Monday! December 30th will be the day though...and with how fast this week is already flying by, hopefully I wont die from anxiousness. We have both tried sitting down and talking about where we would like to go, and we both are stuck. Obviously Texas would be nice, but there is still that tiny little piece of me that wants to pull away and go somewhere new and exciting. Plus we don't know if Texas will even be an option, so my next choices consisted of Florida and California (someplace WARM!). To my dismay, Kevin told me Florida is pretty much out of the question since there are so many people in his class who will be picking that as their first choice. The whole "picking" process is very weird and random to me, but basically the whole class is on a point scale. The longer you have been in the Coast Guard, and if you have had at least 6 months of sea time you get more points. Kevin has more than several people because he has already been in a year, but the people who have been at sea will dominate and pretty much get whatever they pick (which seems to be FLORIDA!) And I really am torn as far as California goes just because it is so expensive to live there! So, we are basically back at step 1, where we are still asking each other where would we like to go. It is probably silly and a waste of time to even think about this, because we don't know what will even be available for us to choose from, but its still fun. Kevin has yet to throw out any ideas or suggestions, so I have no clue where he would like to end up, but I think his heart belongs to Texas, and that is where he wants to stay.


In other news... I started my PRE half-marathon training. haha. I know what your thinking...pre? Well, the program I found to help me train is a 12 week program that begins the first week in December. I wanted to make sure that I could even handle the 2, 3, and 4 mile runs that are in that first weeks program so I decided this week would be used to push myself and get the habit of running going. Yesterday my sister Lauren and I decided we would run to the Sam Houston Campus, and by the football stadium there are huge sets of stairs that go up the hills, and we would run a few sets of those. Mind you...I ran cross country, played soccer, and I did swimming (all of which ended my sophomore year of high school). I went into this thinking that somehow, by the grace of God, I was still in the same shape I was in when I was 16! I mean, of coarse I would be... even though I have gained 50 pounds since then! So we began, and it really wasn't that difficult (in the beginning!) The night before we had traced the route with my mom's car and it was just a little over 3 miles to run to the campus and back to our house. I must have gotten 3/4 of the way to the campus before I started feeling like I was going to DIE! But Lauren was my version of Jillian from the Biggest Loser and pushed me and made sure I didn't walk. We ran the whole way to the campus (1.5 miles), got some water, caught our breath, and then started the stairs from hell! We did ten sets (10 ups, and 10 downs), which doesn't sound like a lot unless you have seen these stairs! I will have to take a picture to post on here so you can feel my pain. Lauren pushed me the whole way through those as well, constantly saying, "just one more set..." Once we finished those we drank some water, walked through the campus until we got to the main road, and ran back to our house. I could have died after all of that with how worn out I was, but waking up this morning I feel so accomplished! Today our goal is to just run 2 miles. I am basically following the training program for next week, so I know that I can do this. As we were ending our run yesterday and I felt like I could collapse on the ground, I kept thinking, "there is no way I am going to be able to do a half marathon" but then again I never would have thought I could run 3 miles again. It was a breaking point for me. I want to accomplish this, I want to do it for myself, and I will! It is going to take a lot of courage, determination, sweat, tears, pain, and support but I will get through this! I am on my way to a new and improved ME and I can't wait!