Super Late 10 Month Post

The older Kael gets, the harder it seems to find the time to sit and update his monthly milestones. He is into EVERYTHING and I seriously can't sit at the computer while he is awake unless Kevin is home to keep him entertained.

This month Kael moved out of the infant room at daycare, and into the "waddler" room. Technically, it is still considered the infant room, but is separated by a half door, and has the mobile infants that are between 10-16 months old. It is crazy to think, that this summer he will be moving up to the Toddler room... I am definitely not ready for that!

Things have been pretty dull around here. We have had a rough winter, which has kept us cooped up indoors. I can't wait for it to warm up... I know Kael is going to LOVE the little playground in front of our house.

We are still struggling (BIG TIME) with sleep. On a good night, he still wakes up 2-3 times (and that is with him sleeping in our bed). I feel so defeated, and don't know what to do anymore. I try not feeding him to break the habit, but he then wakes up EVERY hour until he is finally fed. I really could break down and cry when I really think about it. I am so sleep deprived and feel like I am barely able to function. Kevin and I have yet to go on a date (other than his Christmas party) since Kael was born, knowing that he wont sleep, making it hard on a babysitter, and hard on ourselves for staying up late. It is to the point where I really wish there was some sort of specialist you could take babies to that would just solve their sleeping issues. Any insight would be greatly appreciated! We have tried EVERYTHING and letting him cry only seems to cause more problems.

Other than that, my sweet little boy is perfect (in my eyes!) :)

He is...

1.) weighing in at 19 pounds

2.) wearing 12 month clothes and size 3 diapers

3.) still breastfeeding, with one formula bottle at daycare

4.) eating strictly table food, and eats everything we eat...he isn't picky at all!

5.) standing unsupported for brief amounts of time

6.) up to 3 teeth! :)

7.) very very vocal! He favors "dada" but is constantly making some sort of sound/talking. I can't figure out what he is trying to say, but there is a lot of dooo's and nanana's

8.) And lastly... he is Mr. Personality! There is not a day that goes by that he does not crack me up. I love watching him play, and figure things out. He is so funny, and so smart. Thankfully I think he got the best of both Kevin and I.

Lastly, I have started planning his birthday party, which is a total wake up call. Thanks to Pinterest, I now feel as though anything store bought, just can't be good enough for my sweet baby boy, so I must attempt to make it all (and then figure out how to ship it down to Texas). We are actually having two parties for him, one in Alaska and one in Texas. Obviously the Texas one will be much bigger, and I feel as if an event planner might be necessary (not really, but it is going to be THAT big). Oh! And we have decided the theme will be "pirate" since his party will be at South Padre Island.

Happy 10 months sweet boy! You have made my life so much better, and remind me each and every day just how good life is! :)

A Month of Recaps (9 Month Update)

Whew... what a whirlwind it has been! It seems as though it has been nonstop since Christmas. As you know, we spend Christmas morning in the ER. We soon found out that Kael had hand, foot, and mouth disease- which was spread throughout the entire daycare. I eventually ended up catching it myself (New Years Eve), so our holidays were spent with high fevers and itchy red bumps. Thankfully everything cleared up in time for our trip to Texas and Florida.

We spent roughly 2 weeks of January on a much needed vacation. We enjoyed a week in Texas, which was really too short. We spent 3 days with Kevin's family and 3 days with mine. Since my parents are divorced, it really makes things seem even shorter since we had to split up those 3 days. I was fortunate enough to see a good majority of relatives on both Kevin's side of the family and my own. I even got to see my three best friends in the entire world- Eli, Kelli, and Paige. It was by far not enough time with any of them, and these trips just make me desperate to get back to Texas.

After our week in Texas, we took our first ever family "vacation". A real, live vacation that wasn't going home to visit family. Kevin and I have never taken a real vacation since we have been married, including a honeymoon. We have traveled and seen a lot, but most has been during our moves. We stayed at the All Star Movie Resort at Walt Disney World for 5 nights, and enjoyed the park for 4 days. It was heaven. I am absolutely obsessed with all things Disney (I fall asleep watching the Disney Chanel), so Kevin kept saying the trip was more for me than Kael! I think all three of us enjoyed it equally, but I was definitely more enthusiastic about it. Kael was in heaven. He loved the loud music and colors of the parades, he wanted to hug and kiss every character, and surprisingly we were able to take him on almost every ride! I will do a whole separate post on our trip, but we haven't even been home 2 weeks and I am already wishing we were going back. If we don't get to move to Texas next summer, I am seriously pushing Florida so I can go to Disney every weekend!

This month I was also a slacker on Kael's 9 month post. And this actually breaks my heart, because here I am... a month later and I can not for the life of me tell you what all happened. I know we celebrated his first Christmas, so I am thankful that I managed to get that post written. So much seems to happen and change in a month, and documenting it is SO important because you don't realize how quickly you forget. Looking back at the month of December there are a few key things that seem to pop out in my mind.

1.) We left him with a sitter for the first time.

2.) He weighed in at roughly 18 pounds 8 ounces

3.) He is wearing 9 month clothes and size 3 diapers

4.) He is still breastfeeding, and substituting one bottle a day of formula

5.) He is getting fed up with baby food and we are starting to introduce more table food

6.) He is cruising along the furniture

7.) He got his first tooth (FINALLY!)

8.) We are still struggling with his sleep and he has actually moved into our bed (I know I know...)

What I can remember is the love that I feel for this little boy. It seems to grow with every passing month, and I don't know how that is even possible. He finds new ways every day to make me smile and want to just scoop him up and love and kiss on him all day long. He makes even the worst days better. He gives me hope. He makes me strive to be a better person. He is my world, and I can't imagine what my life would be like without him in it.

Christmas 2011

Forgive me for being a little late with this post, but we have been fighting the virus forefront for the past week, and things are finally beginning to go back to normal.

This was our second Christmas in Alaska and away from family. Our first was tough. REALLY tough. I think I cried most of the day. It just didn't seem natural to be so "alone" when I am used to being surrounded by 12 aunts/uncles and 20+ cousins and second cousins. I come from a large family, my dad is one of seven, so our holiday get togethers are massive... and I LOVE it! I honestly wouldn't know how else to celebrate other than surrounded by lots and lots of people. Kevin's family is pretty similar. We love it... the noise, the laughter, the food, the mess, everything. And I miss is terribly being up here. Christmas in 2010 was just Kevin and I. We had one friend come over for our Christmas dinner and that was it. I was a pregnant, hormonal mess and couldn't wait for the day to be over because I was so heartbroken.

This year was completely different. We had Kael. Although we were still thousands of miles away from our families large and loud get togethers, we knew that being home and letting Kael crawl out of his bed (ok... OUR bed) Christmas morning would be priceless. (plus the tickets to fly home were about $1,000/person cheaper if we waited to go home in January). We it was decided... we would make the most out of our 2nd annual Alaska Christmas because we had to, for the sake of Kael, whether he would remember it or not.

We really put alot of thought into what traditions we wanted to start as a family. We have both always put up our Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving, so that one was a given. We both have pretty bad allergies, and having two male dogs who like to pee on things, we have avoided live trees, and stuck with our puny fake tree (which I'm hoping to replace next year). We were determined to find a beautiful tree topper that we would use every year, but that never happened. We also wanted to find a really special tree skirt- one that I could pass down. After searching high and low, we found it... and it didn't come from a store. It came from my dad's sewing machine. I love everything about it, but most of all, the fact that it was handmade by my dad- Kael's Papa. It makes it that much more meaningful. We also found a really cute shop in town that had a variety of unique ornaments. We have decided that every year we will go out and each of us will get to pick a new ornament. In addition to that, we will go to a local bookstore and find a Christmas book that we can read throughout the holiday season. I also made handmade ornaments with Kael, which turned out really special and we will do every year. I made some with his handprints, and some I cut out using cookie cutters and let him finger paint.

The festivities started Christmas Eve. We had roughly 12 people over for dinner and drinks on Christmas Eve. Only one other family had kids, but they go to day care with Kael and so the 3 boys had a blast playing with each other all night. The adults enjoyed standing around talking and eating our mexican inspired dinner. We both have always had tamales for Christmas Eve growing up and it seems impossible to find them here. We finally found someone who makes them, but was going to charge $25/dozen and there was just no way we were going to pay that. So instead we had chicken and beef fajitas, beans, and rice. Kevin made his grandmothers sand tarts and I made sopapilla cheesecake. We also had my homemade salsa and queso. At about 9 everyone left, and we started getting ready for bed. That included opening one present- our new Christmas pajamas (which I had already washed because I couldn't stand the thought of scratchy pajamas).

As we put Kael into his new pajamas I realized he was feeling a little warm. I took him temperature and it was 101. We gave him Motrin and hoped for the best... 3am he woke and was still at 101. I gave him another dose of Motrin and we were back to bed. And then 5am rolled around and he was on fire! I took his temp and he was 102.5. I panicked... we had received a call Saturday morning that a baby in his class had been diagnosed with Chicken Pox. So we all bundled up and headed to the ER. The good thing about small towns is you don't have to wait. We got right in, and they started checking him out. He was not himself... my heart hurt. I wanted him to feel better, I wanted to fix it, but I couldn't. They told us he had an ear infection, gave us some medication, and sent us on our way.

He fell asleep on the way home and we decided we would wait until later in the afternoon to try and do presents. As we pulled up to our house, he woke up and started crying. I knew he was uncomfortable and just wanted to get him inside and cuddle with him. As we walked through the living room towards the bedroom, we passed the Christmas tree and all the gifts Santa had left. He did a double take as we walked by, stopped crying, and his eyes lit up. I put him on the floor and he started crawling towards his new dino walker. He was acting like he felt perfectly fine! So we sat and opened gifts. He loved ripping the paper and eating the bows.

All of the action must have worn him out, because soon after we finished, he was passed out. He was still running a fever and not feeling 100% the rest of the day. We all ended up taking a 3 hour nap that afternoon. Once we got up, we realized it was time to kick things into high gear to get ready for dinner. We had 4 friends over that night for dinner. Kael was not feeling good at all, and was pretty fussy and clingy. It broke my heart to see him like that.

Although it wasn't my picture perfect "Baby's First Christmas" I had envisioned, it is definitely one that I will never forget. And there is always next year...

(I swear... internet in Kodiak sucks! It wont let me upload any pictures, but I will try again tomorrow)

8 Months Old!

As I sit in my quite living room while Kael is asleep (for now...), I can't help but look through all of our pictures. I seem to do this on the 3rd of every month. It always blows me away how much he has changed since the previous month, and then I jump back to when he was first born or only 2-3 months old and he seems SO different.

This month seemed to go by way too fast. I tried to prepare myself for this... the holiday season. I knew that it would fly by, especially knowing that it will be his first Thanksgiving and Christmas. The holidays always go by too quickly, and now that we are getting to share them with this little guy, it seems as though I can't keep up!

This month I am beginning to realize that I am going to seriously have my hands full with this one. Kael is such a busy body. He doesn't like to sit still, and is learning how to get into everything. He is now able to walk along the couch, the shelves, entertainment center, end tables, and basically anything that he can reach. He will take a few steps with his walker, but for the most part, he would rather sit and play with the buttons that play music. His new past time is opening the cabinets to the entertainment center and pulling every single one of Kevin's video games out (at least they aren't my Wii games!).

Other milestones/facts about Kael this month include:

• We are starting to offer some table foods. So far he tried (and actually eaten) bagels with cream cheese, french toast (no syrup), bran muffins, biscuits, nutragrain bars (he stole a bite of mine one morning, and now begs for it whenever I have one), string cheese, crackers, noodles, and guacamole. Most of this, he tries at daycare. We use a USDA food program there, and provide breakfast, lunch, and a snack for every child. We offer the table food to the babies once they are 10 months old, but he has had such an interest in what we are eating that I have starting letting him try pretty much whatever we are eating. Something he likes, and somethings he spits out right away.
• He still has ZERO teeth! The past two weeks have been rough and I have been swearing up and down that I feel a tooth RIGHT there, but it still hasn't come, so I'm beginning to think I'm making it up.
• I'm not sure what his weight is, but he seems as though he is just getting taller and taller. He has really thinned out, and has been keeping pretty steady with his clothes (thank goodness!). He is still in 9 month clothes and size 3 diapers, but I am thinking we will be making the switch to 12 month clothes pretty soon.
• We are still breastfeeding. I have been supplementing a bottle of formula a day, but mainly because I have become so frustrated with the whole pumping process and the stress of having enough to give him a bottle at daycare. He used to refuse the formula and I would have to mix it with 2-3 ounces of breast milk, but now he has no problems with it. I have good and bad feelings about this. I'm glad that we have that option since I pretty much don't have any stored milk anymore, but at the same time it breaks my heart knowing that he could make the switch to all formula and would probably be just fine. I'm not ready to give it up, and don't feel the need to. I am thankful to know that while we are on vacation next month, I will have the option of giving him a bottle of formula if we are in a situation that would make it difficult to breastfeed.
• We are still having MAJOR issues on the sleep front. He has pretty much moved into our bed, where I nurse him roughly 3 times in the middle of the night since it seems to be the only thing that will get him back to sleep. I know this is going to come back and bite me in the butt, but I am so desperate for sleep at this point, I can't think straight! Last night he was up every hour! We are trying to slowly move him back into his own space, starting by putting him to sleep in his pack n play in our room. At this point, he is typically going to bed around 7:30-8:00 and waking around 12, 3, 6, and waking for good around 7-7:30. I thought things were supposed to get better as they get older, but boy was I wrong!
• Kael has developed full blown stranger and separation anxiety, which both put a lot of stress on me. At work it is especially difficult. He loves the teachers he is with every day, but if someone is out and a new person comes in, he freaks out and cries the entire time. He is the same way when it comes to me. If I leave the room while he is playing, once he looks up and sees that I am not in there, he loses it, and starts frantically crawling around trying to find me. It makes me feel loved, but makes it so hard to get anything done!
• He had his second haircut this month and they actually used the trimmers! They took his little sideburns off, which he has had since he was born. I shed a few tears, but overall, they did a good job. He had gotten to where he just couldn't see. I'm still not sure how I will have them cut it once he turns one, but I don't think I can handle a "real" haircut, where he would look like Kevin. I need some hair to run my fingers through!
• He is a big fan of the 3 B's- Bubbles, Balls, and Books. After looking through countless ads and commercials trying to find the best toys to get him for Christmas, I've come to realize that he would be perfectly content with a pile of board books that he can sit and flip through the pages of. He also likes to try and eat them, but we are working on that.

I could probably go on and on about all of the fun things that we did this month as well, but considering he has been sleeping for an hour, I am going to go and relax and enjoy some quite time before all hell breaks loose tonight!

So Much to be Thankful For...

Wow! Thanksgiving came and went in a blink of an eye! We had a great day, hosting Thanksgiving at our house, celebrating Kael's first turkey day, plotting our black friday routes, and enjoying a 4 day weekend. Sadly, I must admit... I felt as if I didn't get to fully enjoy the day as much as I was hoping for. I was cooking or cleaning from sun up to sun down (well, even longer since we only getting about 6 hours of sunlight right now). Thankfully, we have definitely set some new traditions, including a few recipes that were to die for! I also learned my lesson, and now know better for Christmas.

So since the hustle and bustle of Thanksgiving has passed, I am finally finding the time to sit and write. I have so much to be thankful for this year, it is overwhelming. More than ever, I am taking a step back and looking at the little things. The things that I take for granted everyday, and the things that I complain about the most. In this holiday season I am always reminded of those who are less fortunate, and it always helps to keep me grounded.

So here we go, my "list" of all the wonderful things in my life!

• First of all, I am thankful for living in Kodiak. Although it has been a huge adjustment and I feel like I hate it at times, it is where Kevin and I have been the most successful- financially, fertility wise, my employment, and Kevin's advancements. This place has been good for us, and even though we can't wait to be close to family again, this has brought 'our' family closer than ever.
• I am thankful for our health. Something so simple, yet so life altering.
• I am thankful for our beautiful baby boy. And more importantly- his health as well.
• I am thankful for our tiny 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom apartment. It may not be ideal, but we have a roof over our head, beds to sleeps on, and food at our table.
• I am thankful for our 2005 Pacifica that we bought used and are still making payments on. It may not be fancy or new, but we have a reliable family car that gets us to where we need to go.
• I am thankful for our jobs. There might me times where we wish we made more, but in times like these, we are lucky to have a job at all.
• I am thankful for our student loan payments. As much as they suck us dry every month, they are a constant reminder that we have our education- and that is something that can never be taken away.
• I'm thankful for technology. Even though we live thousands of miles away, technology makes it possible to see our family face to face during the holidays (and every other day as well!)
• I'm thankful for amazing friends, far and near. The kind that you can not talk to for weeks or months, but once you are able to finally catch up, you don't even miss a beat!
• And of coarse, I am thankful for my wonderful husband and perfect son. I can't imagine life without them!

I hope everyone is enjoying this holiday season, had a great Thanksgiving, and have a very Merry Christmas!

7 Months (only 2 weeks late...)

Wow... I have been working on this post for TWO weeks now. It has been sitting in my edit folder for days, and every time I sit down to finish, I find something else that seems to need my attention right away. But here you go (finally!)

It is getting harder and harder to get a good picture of him...He just wont sit still!

Where is the time going? It sounds so weird to say that Kael is 7 months old. It just doesn't seem real... how is it possible? It feels like just yesterday I was feeling him move in my belly, and now I am chasing him around the house!

This past month has honestly been the most fun we have had so far. He is getting to that age where he is just FUN. He has such a big personality, and I love getting to see him shine through. We did a lot to take in and enjoy Fall (since November typically brings snow in Alaska), and to prepare for his first Halloween.

This past month has been a HUGE one developmentally, but more than anything, he is recognizing the people around him. We dealt with a little bout of stranger anxiety and are still dealing with separation anxiety (he wants mom ALL.THE.TIME.) He is very aware of the people around him, and it takes him a while to warm up to new ones. He loves his teachers and greets them every morning with a huge smile. They really are like extended family, and I'm so thankful for those girls (they are some of the best friends I have here). He is close with them, and loves sitting in their laps to read books or to just get a little extra attention. He knows who his mommy and daddy are, and gets VERY excited to see either of us. The best feeling in the entire world is walking into the house after leaving him with Kevin, and him crawling up to me as fast as he can, laughing the entire way. He is genuinely excited to see us when we have been gone, and gives the best hugs and kisses once he is picked up.

A few random tidbits on eating:

*He is still breastfeeding, and I'm pretty sure we will stick it out the entire first year. There are days I want to throw in the towel because it dictates my schedule so much, and I keep thinking about our vacation in January, but I know those are selfish reasons, and could never give it up for that.

*He has ZERO teeth

*He is eating like a champ. He has tried chicken and turkey purees (mixed with veggies), and really likes it. He is also feeding himself. We started with mum-mums, which to this day are his favorite. He also feeds himself puffs and yogurt drops, and really enjoys those as well!

He has mastered crawling, and is ALL OVER the place now! I thought we had the house baby proofed, but boy was I wrong! I have had to say so long to my candles, a good amount of picture frames, and all my nice knick knacks around the house. We have tried to hide every cord imaginable and besides vacuuming every night, I am having to stay on top of sweeping/mopping and now dusting (since his little hands and mouth are on every piece of furniture we own). And as if the crawling didn't keep us busy enough, he has now masted pulling up to stand AND getting down. He seems to enjoy teething on our entertainment center and end tables as well...

Kael had his first school picture day this month as well. Kevin had been in Anchorage for a training, and was able to stop by a mall and pick up a few things for Kael. I actually gave him the freedom to pick out Kael's picture day outfit! :) The picture came out pretty funny (he was pretty confused by the whole process, did a little crying, and would not smile) so we did a mini photo shoot at home (it wasn't much better).

He had his first trip to the park in our beautiful Alaska fall weather.

And we enjoyed lots more time outside while the weather was still nice. We also had lots of fun with pumpkins!

We enjoyed his first Halloween this month as well. First, he participated in a costume parade at school, where he got to show off his lobster costume (thank you Nana and Popdaddy). After school, we stopped by the gym to check out the CDC party which included a bounce house and some other fun stuff that was just a little too big for him. We went home and changed into our warm Superman costume, and walked around the neighborhood with two other families for trick or treating. He didn't last too long, he was ready for bed and it was pretty chilly, but overall it was a great experience. Sadly, Kevin had to work that day so he missed out on it all. The joys of being a military family...

We also had his 6 month photo shoot the day he turned 7 months. We had some scheduling issues, thanks to Kevin's schedule (surprise surprise!) but regardless, I am so excited to see them. I have only seen one picture so far, but I know they are going to be amazing. I'm hoping to get them all right before Thanksgiving. He was such a handful, considering he doesn't sit in one spot for longer than about 2 seconds, but Amy Earle with Simply B Photos never fails to amaze me with her talent and patience!

Look at that cute naked body!! :)

Forgot What That Felt Like...

Today Kael is 7 months old. I should be working on his update, but I really just don't have the energy to upload a bunch of pictures and sound sentimental and excited about him growing up. The truth is, I wish he would stop growing so fast. It makes me sad. I feel like I never fully got to enjoy the "baby" stages because he blew right through them. But most of all, I am TIRED. This boy does not sleep anymore and it is killing me. I have to struggle to stay away when I'm at work, and I cringe the close it gets to bedtime because I know that no matter how hard I pray, I will still be getting up every 2 hours.

But the real reason I am writing this post is because I experienced a feeling- an emotion if you will, that I haven't felt in a REALLY long time.

WARNING: this is a little TMI

After trying to have a baby for so long, it has really been pretty weird to try and prevent from having another one. I'm not on birth control because I have never been, and just don't want to open up that can of hormonal worms. We have really been careful, but there was one night where we slipped. We let our "emotions" get the best of ourselves and didn't use our best judgement. Of coarse, we immediately regretted it, and I have since then been convinced that I would somehow, by some sort of ironic miracle, get pregnant.

For the past two weeks I have been calculating in my head how old Kael would be, how we would make it work in our 2 bedroom house, what we would name it if it was another boy, etc. I really would feel pretty sick thinking about having another one so close in age. I know I want more kids, but I feel like if I were to get pregnant now, I would be taking away so much from Kael and in a way, forcing him to grow up. I want to cherish this time with him, and I would like to be able to sleep through the night for a while before giving those up again.

Well, today my period decided to arrive. Right on track. And my first thought was, THANK GOD! And then I thought... WOAH! I can't remember the last time I felt that way. I remember constantly thinking "Damn You!" whenever I got my period, and now I am rejoicing. It is so bittersweet. It makes me wonder if it will take us as long to get pregnant the second time, or if my first pregnancy has somehow "fixed" whatever problem we faced before.

Any who... I will get to Kael's update, more than likely this weekend. We had his 6 month (even though he is technically 7 months) photo shoot tonight, and I am so excited to see how the pictures turned out! I got to see a few right on her camera and was breathless.