July = Roller Coaster

Let me begin by saying that I am SICK AND TIRED of all this rain! I feel like we are never going to see summer since all it does is rain all day every day. uggghhhh....

Okay, now that that's off my chest, I can begin my actual post.

This month has been a roller coaster of emotion, and we aren't even halfway through! Luckily, for the most part, it is wonderfully happy emotions which I am super excited to elaborate on.

As you all know, I recently started working for the Child Development Center on the Coast Guard base here in Kodiak. I've been there about a month, and I LOVE it. I am so thankful that I have a job that I ENJOY going to everyday. Granted, there are some tough parts to the job (ie- pregnant co-workers and lots and lots of babies/kiddos), but honestly the good out weights the bad. When I first started, I was considered a floater. I mainly filled in for people who were on vacation, and was with the school aged kids for 2 weeks. The past two weeks I have been in the infant room (working with the "mobile" infants) and I have been told that I am pretty much in charge of my room. The infant room is two rooms that are connected, one side for the little guys, and one for the crawlers/walkers. I've been given all kinds of great materials to use and have just been super enthusiastic about having my "own" room and group of kids.

Well... the infant room as a whole is looking for a new "Lead". This is the person who is actually in charge and does all of the behind the scenes work. Basically what I am already doing on my side. There have been a few girls at work talking about how they might apply, but most of them don't want to be in the infant room (I can't figure out why). While I was talking to my Assistant Director the other afternoon, she paused mid thought, looked at me, and said, "Why don't you apply?!? You would be perfect!" I had been considering it, but didn't want to step on any toes since I've only been there a month. It was a huge honor for her to even consider me for that position, so tonight I sat down and put my application in! Fingers Crossed!! This would be a huge accomplishment, not to mention a huge promotion. (My roller coaster is going up, up, up those tracks!)

Secondly, I hate to bring this up on my "non" Trying to Conceive blog, but I figure it's time for an update anyways. The past few months I have been concerned that I am not ovulating on my own. Last month I did a completely "natural" cycle where I didn't use ovulation tests or temp. Of coarse... that cycle ended in a big fat negative. Since my concerns were increasing, I decided that this month I was going full blown. I want to make sure that my body is working the way it is supposed to, and if not, a doctors visit would be scheduled. I started taking ovulation tests on cycle day 12 (negative), 13 (negative, but a second line was visible which is a huge change for me), 14 (POSITIVE), 15 (POSITIVE), and 16 (back to negative). What all that means.... I AM ovulating! Which also means...we have a chance of getting pregnant this month! Since we knew when I was ovulating, we were able to hopefully time everything out just perfect. So now it's a waiting game... I'm trying not to think about it too much, and thankfully I am so busy during the day I stay preoccupied for the most part. (There goes my little roller coaster chugging up, up, up those tracks even more!)

As you can see... this month has brought a lot of great news. Lots of wonderful possibilities, but lots of waiting and wondering. At this point I'm handing it over to God, and letting him show me the perfect path.

But what is a roller coaster without a drop? And this is probably the biggest drop known to man. For a more detailed recap you can go here for the initial post. If you would like to read more, continue through the September posts.

On July 26, 2009 Kevin and I were blessed with an amazing sight... a positive pregnancy test. After 6 long months of trying, we were expecting our first baby, and were absolutely thrilled to be finally starting our family. You all know what happened after that... The pain has dulled, but is still always in the back of my mind.

I can't believe that it has almost been a YEAR since we saw those beautiful two lines staring back at us, telling us that we were finally getting everything we had been wishing for. I never thought that we would get to this point and still be empty handed. (And the roller coaster goes crashing down, down, down!)

BUT, in honor of staying positive- I am saying some big prayers for another positive in July. It would be extremely special and sentimental to get pregnant this month. I am actually planning on testing on July 22nd, which is only 4days before I tested last year.

So come on July... PLEASE bring lots and lots of good news my way!! Please and Thank You!! :)